Vince McMahon: Good afternoon fight fans! Welcome back to the BloggerNacle Deathmatch for the Elimination round results. With me is the Bloggernacle Snarker.

Bloggernacle Snarker: Hi Vince, glad to be back, and thanks for having me. Hey, what happened to Macho Man?

VM: He couldn't be with us today. He said the fights were too boring, like a bunch of kids fighting in a sandbox. So, he left. But, lets got onto the fight! Snarker, you want to summarize the outcomes?

S: Sure, Vince, glad to.

The first round of combat was a real doozie! They paired off in man vs. man and woman vs. woman and went at it. Black Widow Welch and Don't Mess with Texas Julie went at it, clawing and scraping viciously. It was a close, very close fight. Things got ugly when Julie tore the Black Widow's costume and revealed some odd looking underwear. Not sure what that was about, but it clearly angered the Black Widow. Alas, it was to no avail as the punishing bodyshots Julie threw wore Welch down. She attempted her famous Black Widow Neck Wringer, but it backfired when Julie turned the ropes back on her and took her out.

Meanwhile Greenwood and Decoo duked it out, and I have to say that Greenwood's complete lack of restraint made short work of the civilized Decoo. Decoo's apologies and pleasantries were no match for Greenwood's harsh punches, kicks and headbutts, and Decoo was dispatched on short order.

Then Greenwood and Julie faced off, and it got ugly. Julie immediately delivered several gut shots and delivered a below the belt knee smash that sent Greenwood face down into the mat. "That is for leading all those faithful Mormon Singletons astray for telling them to marry non-members, you pseudo-mormon RINO!!!" But, Adam recovered quickly and delivered a punishing combination that took Julie by surprise. "Forgive me for having my own opinions!" he shouted, axe kicking her to the head. "Now lets see you scrape your jaw off the mat! HA!" he taunted her. Julie rolled over on the mat, and said "Aaron Brown is more of a conservative than you are." Adam went completely nuts at that, screamed and tore the hair on his head with both hands, climbed up the ropes, did a supafly snooka from the top rope, rendering Julie unconcious. Adam stumbled from the ring muttering something, apparently incoherent, it sounded like "I'm not Schwarzenegger...I'm not Giuliani...I'll show you" but I stayed away from him, he didn't look sane.

And the second fight was just as exciting as the first! gst was quickly dispatched by Rusty, his former partner, who apparently deceived him into thinking they would still work together. gst turned his back on Rusty and got leg swept for it, Rusty then quickly rendered him unconcious with an elbow smash to the side of the head. Steve and Lisa didn't even have time to start fighting, Rusty was so quick. Lisa backed away and let the two men duke it out.

Steve and Rusty circled the ring, eyeing each other. Steve said, "Now I am going to take revenge on you for exposing my beautiful creation, the glorious Banner of Heaven". Rusty retored, "Bring it on, Jenn". The two then arm locked and head butted until Steve delivered a knee to Rusty's gut. Rusty crumpled and Steve took advantage to drag him over to the corner and smash his head against the corner post, all the while screaming "I AM NOT JENN!" over and over. But, while Steve was obsessed with smashing Rusty's head to a pulp, TMILisa sneaked up on him with a folding chair and whalloped him. Both Rusty and Steve slumped over, and the Ref declared Lisa the winner! And she didn't even work up a sweat. Upon leaving the ring, Lisa was overheard saying "I am so glad I didn't get any blood on me this time, the dry cleaning bills are just killing me."

VM: Wow, what an amazing set of fights!

S: I'll say. It took them a couple of hours to get all the blood off the mat. I can hardly wait for the FINAL DEATHMATCH tommorrow!


a random John said... @ December 15, 2005 at 2:10 PM

Is the Snaker going to take bets or at least handicap the match?

Stephen said... @ December 15, 2005 at 8:27 PM

That would be neat.

Kristen J said... @ December 15, 2005 at 10:59 PM

Ahh, soopafly snooka, I haven't thought about that in years

Stephen said... @ December 16, 2005 at 5:18 AM


Hmm, kind of fits this thread. ;)

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