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As the T&S Permabore crowd has returned to the seemingly endless debate on the Word of Wisdom, I came upon a super-secret sealed portion of the Church Handbook of Instructions. Skillfully removing the sealing band with my new and improved Leatherman tool, I came across a shocking addendum to the Word of Wisdom.


After a number of years, Bishops may come to find the afternoon sessions with members seeking confessional, counsel, or simply a sounding board upon which to unload their troubles and opinions to be quite unbearable. It is with this in mind that an exception to the Word of Wisdom has been made.

Bishops may, at their discretion, prior to the first of the aforementioned afternoon sessions, imbibe a maximum of two "shots" of any of the below listed spirits:

  • Jack Daniels

  • Johnny Walker (Red or Black Label)

  • Jim Beam
It is hoped this exception will enable Bishops to more effectively endure the burdens of their office.
Wow. You learn something new every day.

6 comments

Anonymous said... @ June 15, 2006 at 2:24 PM

Actually Snarker, I think Julie wrote an excellent post there.

Anonymous said... @ June 15, 2006 at 3:00 PM

What? No Crown Royal or Johnny Walker 'Blue' label? At least allow the Bishops the choice of drinking something like Yukon Jack. Or is that reserved for Steak Presidents?

Anonymous said... @ June 15, 2006 at 4:02 PM

Did you find the secret part that said that the church had repealed much of the word of wisdom, including the injunction against eating meet except in winter and at other times when better food were not available?

Response to Jodi Stoddard said... @ June 15, 2006 at 7:46 PM

danithew,

That post was by Shiz, not the Snarkette.

Br. Boozer,

I think you have been taking nips off the old bottle too much..."Steak Presidents"?

Anonymous,

I think you are afflicted with what ails Br. Boozer, as well. I do not recall any injunctions against meetings. I wish there were, we have entirely too many of them.

Anonymous said... @ June 16, 2006 at 8:57 AM

Oh, our Bishops deserve a single malt, not that blended crap. I suggest Laphroaig.

Stephen said... @ June 17, 2006 at 1:46 PM

Good posts are always much better to comment on that a riff off a bad one.

This particular post of Julie's wasn't really good, it was excellent.

But it made for a good transition to the joke about what Bishops really need.

No wonder some people want to become bishop.

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