So foul and fair a day I have not seen.

How far is't call'd to Forres? What are these
So wither'd and so wild in their attire,
That look not like the inhabitants o' the earth,
And yet are on't? Live you? or are you aught
That man may question? You seem to understand me,
By each at once his chappy finger laying
Upon his skinny lips: you should be bishops,
And yet your beards forbid me to interpret
That you are so.

Speak, if you can: what are you?

First Counselor
All hail, RUSTETH! hail to thee, blogger of Nine Moons!

Second Counselor
All hail, RUSTETH, hail to thee, blogger of T&S!

Stake Patriarch
All hail, RUSTETH, thou shalt be archipelagiarch hereafter!

Good sir, why do you start; and seem to fear
Things that do sound so fair? I' the name of truth,
Are ye fantastical, or that indeed
Which outwardly ye show? My noble partner
You greet with present grace and great prediction
Of noble having and of royal hope,
That he seems rapt withal: to me you speak not.
If you can look into the seeds of time,
And say which grain will grow and which will not,
Speak then to me, who neither beg nor fear
Your favours nor your hate.

First Counselor

Second Counselor

Stake Patriarch

First Counselor
Lesser than RUSTETH, and greater.

Second Counselor
Not so happy, yet much happier.

Stake Patriarch
Thou shalt get archipelagiarchs, though thou be none:
So all hail, RUSTETH and DONQUO!

First Counselor
DONQUO and RUSTETH, all hail!

Stay, you imperfect speakers, tell me more:
By Sinel's death I know I am blogger of Nine Moons;
But how of T&S? the blogger of T&S lives,
A prosperous gentleman; and to be archipelagiarch
Stands not within the prospect of belief,
No more than to be T&S. Say from whence
You owe this strange intelligence? or why
Upon this blasted heath you stop our way
With such prophetic greeting? Speak, I charge you.

Patriarch and Counselors vanish

The earth hath bubbles, as the water has,
And these are of them. Whither are they vanish'd?

Into the air; and what seem'd corporal melted
As breath into the wind. Would they had stay'd!

Were such things here as we do speak about?
Or have we eaten on the insane root
That takes the reason prisoner?

Your children shall be archipelagiarchs.

You shall be archipelagiarch.

And blogger of T&S too: went it not so?

To the selfsame tune and words.


NFlanders said... @ February 23, 2006 at 3:02 PM

Awesome. Absolutely awesome.

Rusteth: call me if you need some encouragement to knock off a couple of T&Sers. Screw your courage to the sticking place, man!

Mark IV said... @ February 23, 2006 at 3:53 PM

Snary, you are outdoing yourself lately. This is great.

But aren't you concerned you might acquire highbrow affectations, and thus be in need of a takedown yourself?

Us proles think you need to mix in lots of peach stealing monkeys and pull my finger jokes will all the poetry, otherwise somebody might mistake you for a stuffed shirt.

NFlanders said... @ February 23, 2006 at 5:51 PM

Good point, Mark. That reminds me of the Simpson's episode where MENSA members have been running the town and Homer, Lenny and Carl are among the rioters taking back the town for the "sub-omegaloids."

Homer: Come on, you idiots! We're taking back this town!
Carl: Yeah! Let's make litter out of these literati!
Lenny: That's too clever -- you're one of them! [punches Carl]

Anonymous said... @ February 23, 2006 at 6:12 PM

' bout time Shizzle and Dazzle pulled their weight.

Snarkimus Prime said... @ February 23, 2006 at 7:15 PM

Hey Mark IV, pull my finger...



Stephen said... @ February 23, 2006 at 8:25 PM

I find that the Snark adds something to life.

Thanks for the humor.

meems said... @ February 23, 2006 at 8:53 PM

This post settles it. I wanna be friends with you. In real life.

Kristen J said... @ February 23, 2006 at 10:52 PM

You are a true rennaissance dog!

NFlanders said... @ February 24, 2006 at 12:04 AM

Snarky, you are going to be devastated again, but I didn't even notice that you pasted Rusty's head onto Macbeth. That's just the frosting on the cake!

Mark IV said... @ February 24, 2006 at 6:46 AM

From the sublime to the sublimer, Shakespeare and Homer Simpson, both in one thread.

Can the celestial kingdom be any better than this?

Snarkimus Prime said... @ February 24, 2006 at 7:36 AM

meems, we are a cartoon chihuahua, there is no "real life". We appreciate the offer though. If I were real, I would want to be your friend too.

Ned, we don't use frosting. We use icing.

Mark IV, I don't know about sublime, but chances are snarking is prohibited in the D&C somewhere...or maybe in Leviticus.

D. Golden Shizzle said... @ February 24, 2006 at 10:03 AM

Yo, Anonymous! Watch the weight comments :)

Rusty said... @ February 27, 2006 at 11:20 AM

HA! I've been out of town so I just saw this but it's brilliant!

Téa said... @ February 27, 2006 at 6:26 PM

Among the other elements of clever adaptation, I thought *Donquo* merited a mention--all hail Snarkernacle!

Snarkimus Prime said... @ February 27, 2006 at 7:04 PM


We are well pleased thou art amused with out jestings in all good spirit.


Behold Donquo, father of Rusteth.

Téa said... @ February 28, 2006 at 12:20 AM

Indeed, it was a better move than the previously considered Bretquo =)

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